"It always fascinated me how people go from loving you madly to nothing at all, nothing. It hurts so much. When I feel someone is going to leave me, I have a tendency to break up first before I get to hear the whole thing. Here it is. One more, one less. Another wasted love story. I really love this one. When I think that its over, that I'll never see him again like this... well yes, I'll bump into him, we'll meet our new boyfriend and girlfriend, act as if we had never been together, then we'll slowly think of each other less and less until we forget each other completely. Almost. Always the same for me. Break up, break down. Drunk up, fool around. Meet one guy, then another, fuck around. Forget the one and only. Then after a few months of total emptiness start again to look for true love, desperately look everywhere and after two years of loneliness meet a new love and swear it is the one, until that one is gone as well. There's a moment in life where you can't recover any more from another break-up. And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time, well you still can’t live without him. And even if he wakes you up every day by sneezing right in your face, well you love his sneezes more than anyone else's kisses."
-- Marion, 2 Days in Paris

(You know, soliloquys are awesome when bits of them mirror your life.)

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old memories. old feelings. reminiscence. i somehow knew i'd look back on those days and laugh. also, A LEVELS START TOMORROW LOL LOL LOL.

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short post here before i head back to the notes. i realise that my standard of chinese has dropped dramatically ever since i came to ac. not that it was tremendously good before or anything, but at least i could read/say/comprehend chinese with a certain level of understanding (not much can be said for my writing though haha).

now i have to read something twice before i can actually understand it, even if it is in relatively simple chinese. and when i speak chinese (rare occurrence), it is rather halting and occasionally i mispronounce words in an english accent. for the latter i sort of blame the clb people hahaha, they've been my only source of chinese for the past two years lol.

at least i'm somewhat glad that i can still listen and understand chinese (even if i can't write/speak/read it much). must be all those chinese duets that i put on my ipod hahaha (: i'm almost ashamed to call myself chinese sometimes, but i think after As i really ought to put in a little more effort into speaking more chinese cuz i think its sort of embarrassing.

however, if you are like me and your chinese also stinks after two years of not speaking it or having anything to do with it really, then maybe you ought to get some practice just like me! here, have a nice picture to comprehend. it illustrates the chinese standard and ideal for the perfect and most desirable bachelor! hahaha. after staring at it for a bit i finally got it and then i started LOL-ing in front of my laptop. i think my dad thinks i'm crazy now. i thought it was pretty cute (:

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Today, while riding on a bus,
I saw a girl with golden hair...
I wished that I could be as fair.
Then suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and wore a crutch...
But as she passed, she wore a smile.

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine...
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.

I stopped to buy some candy.
The lad who sold it had such charm.
I talked with him, he seemed so glad.
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
Who do not mind that I am blind."

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine...
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.

Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue.
He stood and watched the others play.
He did not know what he should do.
I stopped a moment, and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others, dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew... he couldn't hear.

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine...
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.

With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I would know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine...
I'm blessed indeed, the world is mine.

No, I didn't write this, but whoever did is amazing. It just serves as a reminder as to how blessed we truly are, even amidst all the supposed crap we are going through.

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another post from dearoldlove.tumblr.com (thanks to pak for the recommendation). looking at the picture brings back such memories, truly. the feelings were so yesterday but i guess some memories stick with you for a while. i should be sleeping actually. need to do some major spamming tomorrow, 1.5 weeks left and i'm still feeling unprepared WHY IS THIS SO.

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koped off nush's friends-only lj blog. A Levels is killing me, omg. and i'm not bloody getting anywhere with anything and it's demoralising me. ate a whole bag of cookies today though.

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i hate falling sick. and it's not like i've been pushing that hard or being that productive enough for my body's limits to be reached or anything. i suspect that i'm worrying too much and that's probably taking a toll on me mentally. sigh. okay time for a nice song before i head back to geogifying myself dead.

will i be there when you call me in the middle of the night?
will i keep the rain from falling down into your light?
i promise, i promise
i promise i will

(this song sounds best when it's blasting into your ears via earphones instead of via laptop speakers. this is a proven fact.)

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